Vicarious Living

I'm in the midst of it with Frank. I'm so excited for him, I'm almost beside myself. It was a long time ago, but I still remember, at his age, the uncertainty of what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I knew what I wanted to do, my mother had other ideas. At the time, and in hindsight, she was completely wrong. She convinced me, by refusing to fund any other pursuit, that my only chance at success in life was to become an accountant. If I did, she told me, I could always fall back on teaching, that is if I wasn't able to handle the real deal. Creative? No, I had no creativity. I've made jokes about how she really wasn't using reverse psychology, but it wasn't a joke. 

Fast-forward to Frank and his decision about fields of pursuit. Frank loves music. He loves listening to it, he loves making it, he loves seeing it performed live, and performing. He's also a pretty good video editor, reporter and anchor, being the senior-most person in the Ridgeline TV department. He's also up for an internship with the school district to film for their communications department.

Knowing all of this, and remembering how hard it was to discuss this with my own mother, I've really taken a backseat in his decision-making. It's a fine line to walk between too much influence and not enough support. I'm sure I haven't achieved the perfect balance, despite trying my hardest. However, I do think the decisions he's making are his own, and are ones he's happy with.

So what are they? Pursuit of a music degree with an emphasis in producing. The colleges that offer those programs typically include some kind of performance component, songwriting, along with theory. But the emphasis is music production technology. His first choice, Berklee School of Music in Boston. It has a thirty-four percent acceptance rate, and even when you get in, it's highly competitive. My plan was to take Frank for a visit over spring break, but the more we learned, the more roads to it popped up. 

Now what? Berklee is an amazing school for people trying to figure out if they want to apply. There are academic advisors on hand about twelve hours a day, who are thrilled to talk about a student's prospects and the best road to get there. I think the course we have mapped out will serve him well. Yesterday he said that if he does everything necessary to get into Berklee, then he'd certainly have what he needed to get into his second, third or fourth choice. Prudent he is.

As I watch him navigate this new time of his life, that's where the vicarious living comes in. The world is wide open for him to pursue a career in a field he loves. Better? He can actually make a good living doing it. And not just one thing. There are so many career opportunities and areas of specialization he could pursue with this type of degree. 

There's promise and hope and excitement . . . along with parents who are wiping their brow, thankful that he has found something he loves. 

I wrote a Facebook post the other day about how it is a parent's job to guide our children to chase their dreams and LIVE their passion. It's starts now. Actually it started years ago, and continues. If only we all could be so lucky.