Maybe I Need a New List

Yesterday morning, as we drove the two-plus hour drive from Monument to Ft. Collins, my friend Deanne and I spent a lot of time talking about music. She knows light years more than I do about the technical aspects of music, and the music industry. But when it comes to new music, I’ve become the person she relies on to keep her current.

A song by Airborne Toxic Event came on and I told her that if one, I ever played the lottery, and two, I ever won it (hard to do when you don’t do number one), I would immediately hop on a plane and see whatever their next concert was. They are, after all, my favorite band, and I’ve never seen them live.

I think I said something about it being on my bucket list. At that point, the conversation swerved to how I was too young to have a bucket list. In the back of my mind I thought, but the first thing on the list is seeing a bald eagle in the wild. I started to say it outloud, but by that point the conversation had moved in another direction, and it seemed off-topic.

Less than ten minutes later, I looked at a tree alongside the I-25, and saw a white head on top of a brown body. I slowed as much as was safe on that stretch of highway. I looked, and looked, and looked. I’m farsighted, so I could really see it. And sure enough, it was a bald eagle. 

Given that I had just been thinking about it, I teared up. Sunglasses hid what probably would’ve mortified my son, sitting in the back seat with his girlfriend who was spending her first day with us. I couldn’t hold my excitement though, I had to talk about it. So I did. Deanne was incredulous that I had never seen one in the wild before, of course, she goes to Alaska every year, so she’s probably seen many. 

I have to admit, that this morning, writing about it, I am tearing up again. It was a big damn deal to me. Whether it would be to anyone else is beside the point. No one else matters, it was my bucket item. 

I have a friend, who I’ve known since middle school, who asked me a few weeks ago if I still had premonitions. I asked him why he asked me that question. He went on to inform me that he and I had conversations about it, back in middle school. At first, I thought he might be teasing me about it. I had no recollection of the conversation, or any conversation with him really. But then I remembered something that happened with my grandmother and yes, that was probably something I had talked to him about.

Whether it was premonition yesterday or simple coincidence, it doesn’t matter. 

It did get me thinking about things I want to do that I haven’t yet. There isn’t a lot on my list. There are places I want to travel to, certainly, hundreds probably if I sat down and made a list. But in terms of things I want to do, there aren’t many left. 

The biggest, of course, was writing a book. I can check that off in spades. There are concerts I want to see, again, I cannot imagine the length of that list if I actually wrote it out . . . on the other hand, I’m doing a pretty good job of tackling the hypothetical list this year and last! 

As is typical, if I brought this question to Doug, he would immediately come up with a slew of things he’d suggest, that’s just how he is, and only one of a hundred (thousand) reasons why I love him. He knows me, he’d immediately be able to think of countless things that would bring me joy. 

I have a good life, and I appreciate it. I celebrate it. And I try not to ever take it for granted. Do I have gray hair? Yep, and I earned every single one of them that Shelly works hard to cover up every six weeks or so. My body isn’t always willing to do the things my mind thinks it should, but I rarely let that hold me back. I am not the kind of person who focuses on the negative, I am an eternal optimist. So . . . time for a new list, new adventures, new experiences. If you have any suggestions for me, I’m all ears.